An Unfortunate Reality
You’re outside cleaning up in the garden and suddenly you see your mom, who has retired and has Alzheimer’s disease walk away from the house and keep going. You stop, puzzled. Where is she going? You think. Before you can react she’s already travelled a block and half away and isn’t stopping. You run as fast as you can. And when you get to where she is, you ask concerned “What’s going on mom, where are you going?” She looks up and says, “Well I have to go to work now. My shift is starting soon.”
Wandering is an unfortunate reality that is an effect of Alzheimer’s and other dementia. Wandering to go to work is one reason; wandering to go back “home,” is another. They might be living with extended family, who now takes care of them. But since they still only recognize their old home as their “home,” they want to go there. Some people will wander because they’re bored or anxious, or restless. Others might wander because they are in pain and don’t know what to do.
Safe And Unsafe Wandering
There is safe wandering and there is also unsafe wandering. You can only imagine the hazards of wandering outdoors for a person who can’t make sound decisions. They can get lost, freeze in winter, wander into traffic, walk into bodies of water, become dehydrated, or be taken advantage of. Interestingly, it has been stated that many will walk straight (often South) as far as there is nothing to stop them from going forward.
How can you stop unsafe wandering? The truth is every case will be different. Because each person will have their different reason for wandering and they have their own different personality. Ask yourself “Why is this person wandering?” Once you figured out why; you can then tailor your approach to address this issue. In a way that matches their personality and the situation.
Finding Out The Reason
To find out “Why?” listen and watch for signs, such as your loved one wanting to go somewhere they frequented in the past or do something they used to do often. Maybe they are looking for someone they used to know. Watch also for symptoms of pain and discomfort, which can lead to wandering off in search of help or relief. Make sure they have activities to do and are engaged, so they don’t have a reason to wander.
If they are showing signs of leaving, it is best to try to change their minds. But do not do it by force; remember the importance of being with them in their reality. Especially, if they are no longer able to recall today’s reality.
In tailoring your response/approach, here is one example if your mom makes regular statement such as needing to get to work. You might want to try saying, “Funny, I was told you had the day off today. I thought we were going to go out for coffee and a treat instead.”
There’s much more information on Alzheimer’s and wandering that I teach families, especially certain phrases to use and measures to take to prevent wandering. Wandering is very common and can happen at any stage of Alzheimer’s dementia. Please call me at 778-789-1496 or email at [email protected] to help you prevent wandering form happening in the first place, or if wandering has already occurred. It’s better not to let it become an issue in the first place.
P.S. We provide a talk called, “Wandering: Making sense of it” We would be happy to offer this talk for your group.
Karen 🙂
Karen Tyrell, CDP, CPCA
